Happy Thursday. Welcome to this week’s Running with Spoons Thinking Out Loud link party, where stream-of-consciousness is the name of the game! Thanks to Amanda for hosting! Today we’re going to talk about dating, one of my
least favorite topics!
With the end of the year approaching, I’ve been doing a lot of reflecting on 2014 and thinking about what I’d like to see happen in 2015. Naturally, this has me ruminating over my dating life. Or is “love life” the term? Either way, a lot of that is more appropriate for a blog of a different sort, but there is occasionally some intersection when it comes to talking about food and dating. As time goes on, I learn more about my personal dietary deal-makers and deal-breakers. Here are the big ones:
Must love olive oil. If nothing else, 2014 taught me that this is a major red flag.
No food in bed. Especially not Chicken McNuggets when I’m pretending to be asleep. And no, you cannot wear my bathrobe while you’re at it. Why does there even need to be a rule about this? My life…
Outsource your issues. Just because I am a dietitian does not mean I am your dietitian. And no, I do not accept payment in the form of sexual favors.
Respect my preferences, and I will respect yours. Except the no olive oil thing. There are some things I will just never understand, and that’s okay. What I’m really talking about here is dietary restrictions. I happen to be an omnivore, but I will never try to “change” someone who follows a vegan/Paleo/no-red-meat diet. I’m adaptable, and I expect you to let me eat my yogurt/lentils/filet mignon without lecturing me. Possible exceptions include raw vegan diets, given the high quantities of nut cheese involved (Epi pens ain’t cheap) and people who don’t like olive oil.
Please don’t touch me while I’m eating. No, seriously—don’t. This is the main reason there was no second date after the Lobster Taco Incident of 2013. Or okay, one of the main reasons.
Don’t order for me unless I tell you to. This statement probably says a lot about certain other, ahem, preferences, but hey—it’s good to let someone know what you want and what you don’t allow.
What are some of your dietary deal makers/breakers?