Some days I pass the cart on the way to the subway and think, “I want coffee.” Then my logic brain takes over and says, “Why pay money for sh!tty coffee when you can have sh!tty coffee for free at work? Think of all the sh!tty coffee dollars you’ll save!”

My logic brain is pretty smart sometimes.

Not to be a traitor or anything, but the coffee where I work is so bad, it makes Dunkin Donuts look gourmet. Still, free is free, so let us not look a gift horse in the mouth, right? As long as it’s not cream of sum yung gai-flavored. Sadly, the calculator in the above photo just bit the dust today. The “add” button decided to stop working, after many years of faithful service. Somehow, this feels symbolic.